After that conversation, it seemed clear that we weren't going to get any assistance for our sex life by watching something on the television or computer. And so, I made up my mind to just, well, just be satisfied with things the way they were.

Coincidentally, a couple of weeks later, I overheard a bunch of younger guys at the office talking in the cafeteria about a bachelor party they had attended over the weekend.

"Wow, watching that Ingrid, what a turn on," one said.

"And that Mario, what an unbelievable stud," said another.

I sat down near them, trying not to seem too obviously interested. And as they continued to rehash the weekend's events, it became clear that the bachelor party had included some kind of live sex show.

I allowed myself to start thinking, "Maybe I could talk Kathy into us seeing something like that. Maybe, just maybe, she'd be curious enough to see if something in person would be more intense, more real, than watching a video."

But I needed to find out some details. Later in the day, I wandered casually into Jerry's office, a cup of coffee in hand.

"Hi Mark," he said, as he looked up from some drawings he was reviewing.

"How do those look?" I said.

"Pretty good, although I think we're going to need some additional detail on the rear elevation," he replied.

"Great," I said. "By the way, I heard you guys talking about Bill's bachelor party earlier. Sounded pretty hot."

"You have no idea," he said. "To tell you the truth, I never saw a man and woman having sex right in front of me before. Boy, it was pretty intense."